Hopeful for the Truth
by Desstrio
Summary: Kaoru is dealing with the passing of a certain someone. Rated T for character death.
1. Chapter 1

Well, this is a new idea I was inspired to write the other day.

Warning: I'm still working on most of the plot, so don't freak out if updates aren't frequent.

Description: Someone has passed, find out who and why in this fic.

Disclaimer: I own no Ouran... But if I did... Ohho... If I did...

The day was dull, clouds shrouded the sun that was supposed to be beating down on the redheads skin. Instead, the air was cold, and thick. One breath, and your eyes would fill with tears. But then again, they would fill regardless of the air today. Because today, wasn't like all the other days. Today was a day to mourn, mourn the passing of a soul. No one in the community, both rich or poor, never saw this coming. It was an event dreaded despite the person it was for, everyone who was anyone was there today. And they all cried. Not a single man nor women in the backyard had a dry eye.

Awnings that were dressed in black, with flowered lace hanging from the sides, are just another effort to contain the dryness. They prepared for every single thing that could have gone wrong. Too many people showed up? They had extra chairs, that were also robed in black fabrics. If it began to rain? Their awnings were the best money could buy, and custom made for such an occasion. If one stared at them long enough, one would be able to see the blue tint every shade of black bore. _He always liked blue._

Tears were inevitable. When the rain came, it was as if the rain was a symbol of god crying over the lost sole.

"Sweetheart... Honey, the sermon is going to start soon," they told him. They wanted him to stop crying for at least three seconds, so that the other people could hear the expensive preacher preach about the life he had never even been apart of. The life that left his eyes within those three seconds. The life that left his body, like a spirit flying away. The orb that left through his forehead, and slowly floated up. He remembers, because he couldn't take his eyes off of it. It was paranormal, and scarring. Every second that followed were just a reminder of the last. Would the image ever leave his head? Did he actually want it to? He didn't know.

The preacher talked for the longest time, taking very dramatic pauses. Each one seemed at least a second longer them the last. "And in the end, he will be remembered not for what he has done," the preachers voice rose with every other syllable. "But who he has touched, who he has effected. Hikaru Hitachiin was a beautiful young man, full of manners and smiles wherever he went-"

"STOP IT." Screamed a voice which cracked on the 'I'. The young man stood up from his folding chair, fists clenched, face red, and eyes full of tears. "You don't know anything about him! How can you stand there and tell us all lies about him?" He was panting, and being urged to sit back down by his mother. Who to him, didn't seem to be as sad about his brothers passing as he was. Within an instant he was running at the plump japanese man, fighting the tears that almost rendered him sightless. When he reached his destination, he flew punches at the poor man. Tackling him to the ground, and bruising his fairly expensive face.

His relatives were in shock, but surprisingly a little amount. His friends ran to him, scooping him up with their tear stained hands, and pulling him off of the man. "Kaoru, Kaoru you have to stop! This won't bring-"

"Don't you dare say it!" He bellowed. Shoving them off of him, and stumbling backwards himself before he hit the floor. He sat there, continuing to weep, and weep, until his blonde senpai grabbed him, and held him in his arms. Others in the watching crowd began to cry as well. But in Kaoru's mind, no one would ever be as heartbroken as him. He has lost something he's always needed to survive. So, how is he expected to go on?


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two.

In this chapter, you... you learn a little more about what happened towards the end.

I'm sorry it's a really vague story...I myself still don't really know what happened...

Oh well, we all like Kaoru... Might as well keep reading :3

I own no Ouran... :(

It's been weeks, and no one has seen him. The last one who had, isn't saying much about his state. They claim: "It's too sad to say around Honey-senpai." But everyone knew that was just an excuse, what he really meant was: "It's too sad to even recall." This isn't the boy they know and love, this is a monster, created by pain and fueled by sorrow.

He lies there in his room, sometimes he sobs into a pillow, sometimes he's punching a wall. He's never able to put on most of his clothes; they always shared clothes. He no longer eats meals; they'd sit next to each other every meal. They did everything together, never for a moment were they apart from each other, and now since they are forever apart, there is simply nothing to do.

Today, he decides, he wants to try to clear his head. A walk will do it. It always had before. It's one of the one things he's ever done on his own.

"Why do you insist on staying out so late?" His mother would ask him when he stumbles home, the clock normally reads ten. "What are you even doing out? Does your curfew need to be reconsidered?" A smirk flashed across her face, she never gave him the serious punishment talk, like she'd give _him_.

"I'm just walking around the neighborhood," he sighed, obviously not wanting to play along with his mothers fun tone. "I'll try to come home earlier, sorry." Then he'd retreat up the stairs to _their_ room, and sleep off his workout. It would leave her with a shocked expression on her face, which would melt into one with grief. _Why was he so shy? Why didn't he act more like his brother? Their twins for goodness sakes! You'd think they'd act like it more often..._

The cool breeze hit his face lightly, his eyes rolled back in his head as he took a deep breath. They still burned from earlier, when they were drained of their tear supply. And the cold breeze only made them sting. He lurched his body forward, urging himself to continue walking, though his body didn't want to comply, he set off down the long driveway, and down the sidewalk. No one ever really went out for walks where others may see them, they had thousand acred back yards for that, or giant mansions with gym equipment. Though there were no reasons for his actions, Kaoru found himself doing many things that he couldn't put a reason behind. He didn't care.

His feet dragged him round the block, then down another road he was all to familiar with, one that wounded around the rich neighborhood he was brought up in. He'd often take this path when _he_ got to much to handle, when _he_ would constantly talk and talk, when _he_ would annoy the hell out of Kaoru and drove him out of the house.

Why can't he place what he'd seen? Why did this happen to him? What did he do that was so bad, that he was forever cursed with this looming depression and pain? He'd take it back if he could, the chance he passed up the day he was taken to the funeral home.

"There won't be an open casket," he was told. "Would you like to see him now?"

Why didn't he take that chance? Because he shook his head no, he'll forever have _his_ face streaming with tears, and the sound of blood curdling screams lodge in his mind. The fear in _his_ eyes, something he'd never seen in those eyes that were exactly like his. The pleads for his own life; "Please, please don't! I can't leave him on his own!" ... Was he talking about me?

"No, I... I don't want to see him in there...like that..."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter three. Yay.  
>Okay, depending on who you are, you might see some HaruhixKaoru in here.<br>But it wasn't intentional, I swear.  
>Unless ou want it to be. Then it was..<br>I'll shut up now..

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><p>The day he returned to school was heart wrenching. His face was red, his hair was a mess, his coat wasn't pressed and covered in wrinkles. Everyone greeted him when he walked through the entrance to the school, he was met with a hug from Mitskuni, a heart felt nod from Takashi, Haruhi even came over and gave him a slight smile. "It's going to be alright," she told him, as she touched his arm. The boss himself was wallowing in his own despair, but, it wasn't showing. His face wasn't red, his eyes were perfectly fine, his hair was comb back like usual, and his suit looked normal. But inside, Tamaki's stomach turned when he looked at Kaoru; while it was true that every time anyone looked at him all they could see was his brother. Whether they saw his laughing face, or imagined his sleeping form six feet under, no one could look at Kaoru for to long.<p>

He noticed, as the day dragged on, people apologized to him. Again and again people walked up to him, either red faced, red eyed, stuttering, or choking on their words, they all came to him, and apologized. For his heartache, for his loss, for what he must be going through. His teachers even excused him from all of his homework, even the grumpy math teacher, who assigned at least four pages of work a night; can you believe that?

At lunch he didn't eat, he sat at a table with his hands in his pockets and stared at the grainy, sandy design on the table. It wasn't at all interesting, but lunch was mandatory, and there was no where else for him to go. He caught stares out of the corner of his eye like a frog would catch bugs, everyone gave him this look that screamed; poor thing. He hated it. He wanted them to view him as strong, never was he the twin that was viewed as the brave individual who could do whatever he wanted if he could.

Kaoru stood, and stood tall. He walked towards the lunch order station, and grabbed himself a tray. "Lunch A with a B salad please." through his voice cracked, his face never faltered. The chefs took one look at him, nodded, and set to work. One was about to speak, but then quickly decided against it. They set the food onto his tray, and he strode right back to his seat.

For the longest time he sat there staring at his food, trying to remember how to pick up his fork, and trying to figure out what he was supposed to do after that. Suddenly, something light and warm touched his shoulder.

"Hey Kaoru, how're you doing?" It was Haruhi, he knew it the moment her hand grazed his shoulder. His heart skipped a beat.

"Oh... Hi," was all he could muster up, scooting over just the smallest bit; though there was enough room for Haruhi to sit. "I'm fine, I just don't think I'm all that hungry..."

"Well, that's an awful lot of food for someone who isn't hungry," she added, setting out her own sandwich and the last of the chips from the bag at home. "How have you been today? How many people come up to you and say sorry?"

Kaoru couldn't believe his ears, how did she know that that has been happening to him? "What do you mean?"

Haruhi gave a small sigh, and looked past Kaoru. "When mom died, everyone in Japan said they were sorry to me and my dad. It bugged me after a while, because, even to this day, I don't think they truly understood how I felt. I mean, they didn't lose a mom, I did."

Kaoru continued to stare at her, dumbfounded. Someone who understands...


	4. Chapter 4

Here's chapter 4.  
>I'm starting to notice how morbid I am.<br>Don't worry, this isn't THAT gory, or anything...  
>Thanks for sticking with me for this long!<br>I'm not sure if anyone's noticed, but each chapter is about the same length. Each one is exactly a page long...  
>Just thought you'd all want to know.<p>

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><p>That encounter left him thinking; maybe he could survive on his own. Maybe he didn't have to wallow day in and day out, look at Haruhi, she's smiling all day and laughing, and joking around. Why couldn't he?<p>

That was it. He's taking a stand, no longer will he be the little crying baby that he's been so carelessly titled as. He was going to go to school, he was going to do his four page long math homework, he was going to go to the host club, and flirt with the girls all on his own. He could do it, it couldn't be that hard, right? He's cried for as long as he's needed to, hell, he'd been crying for two weeks, three days, 19 hours, 26 minutes and...about thirty seconds. He was never good at estimating time.

The next morning, as he strode up the long walkway before entering the school, he noticed the stares. The gils watching him, the boy glancing, even a teacher or two regarded him awkwardly. He entered the school, and hurriedly strode to music rom three. There was no other place he'd rather be during the morning, whether he was alone, or surrounded by the other boys.

Upon entering, he was alone. It was better then all the strangers staring at him, he shut the doors behind him, and went to sit on a stray couch. He lounged on it, pulling off his jacket, and hanging it over the back. His hands found the back of his head, and he rested. When was that last time he'd gotten a good nights sleep, exactly? He couldn't remember.

He blinked, thinking he'd just continue to stare at the ceiling, but, once his eyes opened again, the ceiling wasn't the same. Nothing was. The bright walls changed into dark barriers he couldn't even see, but he knew they were there. A light stretched itself towards him on the floor, it stretched to reach his feet, but failed and would retreat. It flickered like fire, Kaoru traced it back to the other side of the room, where an actual fire was lit in the fireplace. It roared, warming him, and stinging his eyes of the sudden amounts of light.

He stood from the couch, his uniform gone, instead, he stood in his pajama's. When had he changed? When had he left the club? All he did was blink!

The room seemed eerily familiar, the red hue to all the black, the smell, the feel of the air around him. His heart lurches at the memory.

"N-no, no! What are you doing!" A laugh erupts, making Kaoru jump. No one is around him, he's alone in this room, for all he knows.

"I've given you all the chances I would accept, now, you will pay; whether you like it, or not," came a hollow voice, it was a ghostly sound that flowed on the air of the room.

"Please don't! I'll pay you anything! Anything, I swear!" Came the pleading voice, a loud thud was made, and shadows cast themselves against the wall. Kaoru stared at them, watching as he relived the memory.

A body fell to the ground.

"P-please," the voice whispered. "I can't leave hi-"

A gun fired. Out from the darkness blood splattered across Kaoru's clothes, and face. He quickly reacted, attempting to wipe the liquid off of him, but it wouldn't even smudge. It quickly began burning him, like acid. Like it was burning holes in his skin.

A scream immediately followed, that echoed over and over again, never getting softer. Kaoru covered his ears, tumbling backwards onto the couch. He wished he could run towards the shadow and save the victim, but he was frozen.


End file.
